With this day
my breath beats as if a heart
stuck to concrete
cracks,
veins under skins hiding us
like the streets do the ground.
The ducks swim and the night is in the
water, a trail
left in silent propulsion as the cold air
kicks me out of this
each-and-every-day understanding.
This is wild. I can sense this.
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March 4, 2011 at 3:18 pm
Jingle
glad to see you back..
beautiful poem.
ducks swim imagery is fabulous.
March 7, 2011 at 10:51 am
BFG
thanks Jingle, much appreciated! A pleasure to be back.
March 4, 2011 at 8:22 pm
bendedspoon
Wow to what you can sense! I like it!
March 7, 2011 at 10:52 am
BFG
very much appreciated, thanks for reading!
March 4, 2011 at 11:43 pm
Cindy
I like the veins like streets analogy and am thrilled to see a post from you.
How have you been?
March 7, 2011 at 10:52 am
BFG
thanks Cindy, I’ve been quite well. Started a new job which took my focus away. Settling back into the swing of things now.
March 5, 2011 at 11:41 am
Mary
Wow – this is good. Really good, not just say-something-nice-to-get-to-#18 good. It’s a treat to read. Kudos.
March 5, 2011 at 6:08 pm
Epoch Awareness. Writer, J.D. Hughes
” left in silent propulsion”
I too live on these wild veins of tar and hot ash, Los Angeles as any, cryptic, divine, all understanding buried in daily coals I see.
Keep writing!
March 7, 2011 at 10:53 am
BFG
thanks for your support, I will! Thanks for reading!
March 5, 2011 at 9:08 pm
Paula Tohline Calhoun
This poem reads as a mystery to me. I think I’ve grasped it, and then it slips away. A joy to read and to ponder.
March 7, 2011 at 10:53 am
BFG
I am glad you enjoyed! I hope not too mysterious.
March 7, 2011 at 11:50 am
Paula Tohline Calhoun
Myterious in the best sense: Not unknowable, but thought-provoking!
March 7, 2011 at 12:59 pm
Marian
yes, this is beautiful. nice to meet you!
March 9, 2011 at 9:41 am
BFG
Many thanks for reading. Nice to meet you as well.
March 8, 2011 at 5:02 pm
The Reason You Come
This poem had me at:
“With this day
my breath beats as if a heart
stuck to concrete
cracks”
Breathtaking words!
March 9, 2011 at 9:41 am
BFG
that’s very kind, thank you and thanks for reading.
March 9, 2011 at 12:55 pm
jojo
metaphorically beautiful….
March 9, 2011 at 1:08 pm
BFG
Thanks for reading! Much appreciated.
March 11, 2011 at 1:51 am
kshawnedgar
“Like the streets do the ground” makes me see there’s a truthfulness to life underneath our constructions; the seemingly solid street hides the concreteness of the ground. Really strong images here.
March 11, 2011 at 8:58 am
BFG
thank you for reading and perceptively commenting, much appreciated.
March 12, 2011 at 9:58 pm
Jingle
please return favors to poets who are here, cheers.